Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Adam Rex - The Flight Before Christmas

I've been trying to make this idea work off and on for years.
This is the closest I've come.
-Adam Rex

The Flight Before Christmas

'Tis the flight before Christmas. Our aircraft today
is a Boeing C-25 JingleBus sleigh.
At this time I would like to say "welcome aboard"
and please ask for all luggage and toys to be stored
in the space by your feet or the overhead sack.
Use caution untying the sack when you pack
as the toys may have shifted about during flight.
Santa gets a bit…dazed by the end of the night.
It's hardly surprising for someone who stares
for twelve hours at eight tiny reinderrières.
Plus the eggnog. Our point is, expect a rough ride,
but in two thousand years not one passenger’s died.
In the likely event of a freefall or dive
there’s an oxygen mask that will keep you alive.
We ask that you first find a mask for yourself–
put it on and pull tight before helping an elf.
Get your safety belt buckled, and keep it that way–
no standing or stretching at all in the sleigh.
Not a soul should be stirring, not even the mice.
Our pilot is quite the flotation device!
If we land in the water, hold onto him tight.
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good flight.

©2009 Adam Rex. All rights reserved.

Adam Rex's Frankenstein Makes a Sandwich is always checked out at the elementary school library where I've been the volunteer librarian. In fact, when I want to read a poem aloud from it, I know I have to bring my own copy (then hold onto it tight!). The poems in Frankenstein and its sequel are hilarious and sly and connect with kids perfectly. And the art! Don't get me started on his fantastic illustrations in Frankenstein and its sequel, or his art in his picture book Pssst or Elvira Woodruff's Small Beauties or Amy Timberlake's The Dirty Cowboy or... no, no! I won't start.

Seriously, though, anyone who writes a poem about the Invisible Man going for a haircut or describes Santa looking at eight tiny reinderrières sees the world in a way that's different than most, yet Adam gets his vision across in poem after poem. I hope we'll be seeing more Adam Rex poetry collections... but I'm very happy to see at least one more poem from him here as part of 30 Poets/30 Days.

Yesterday we were In the Museum with Marilyn Singer. Tomorrow brings us Spring is the Time by Joyce Sidman.


BookChook said...

Lots of chuckles from this corner of the planet!

Anonymous said...

Oh, that's funny! Quirky... but funnnny.

Love the poem a day... -- PTB

Candace Ryan said...

With Adam Rex, you know it's gonna be a "wit" Christmas.

Rachel Green said...


Anonymous said...

We liked the poem which reminded us of the poem "Twas the Night before Chritmas". We daily read your poems!

jama said...

Fun and faboo! Rex rocks!

Kelly Polark said...

My kids (and I) love his Frankenstein books!
Great, witty poem- love the reinderriers!

Lee Wind, M.Ed. said...

"reinderriers" is genius.

This is great!


Anonymous said...

reinderrieres did me in as well

Gotta love Adam.

Melissa H. said...

8 tiny reinderriers! Whoo! I love it! Thanks to all for the wonderful poems!

Rita said...

> eight tiny reinderrières!!

I love it! This poem made me laugh and grin all the way through. All the key points of in-flight instruction AND Santa are nailed--delightfully!!!

tanita✿davis said...

Oh, I can see it now -- some airline wag on all the December Southwest flights trying to match the wit in this. But Adam Rex is unmatched. I mean, reinderrières!? -- Plus, the eggnog, which also made me giggle. What fun.

Anonymous said...

Wonderful! I really need the giggles this morning. "reinderriers" Snort! :)

Renee said...

Oh, I LOVE Adam Rex!!

Anonymous said...

Why do I get the feeling that the word 'reinderrières' popped into Rex's head and started this whole thing off? Another awesome poem from a ridiculously talented individual...

Sara said...

Hee. What fun. Color me greedy, but I'm hoping for a whole book of Rex-ified Christmas now.

Ben Clanton said...

Great fun! I just wish that it came with an illustration.

Tarie Sabido said...

Hahaha. I'll have to remember this when it is Christmastime again!